Communicating With Your Spouse: Ways To Stay Connected In A Busy World

Communication is such an integral part of everyday life. How can it not be right? We communicate both verbally, and nonverbally at just about every moment of the day. Where I think it plays the most important part is within the relationships we hold the most dear. For me, those are the relationships I have with my family, friends and most importantly with my parter in life my husband.

So, to give you a little back story I am currently sitting on an airplane. To be honest I'm really emotional because this past week spent at home was much needed and was a big reminder why talking and sharing things with your spouse is so important. G and I have always put big emphasis on communicating. We have really long conversations about what we are feeling, why we are feeling that way and how we can be better communicators moving forward. I haven't always been that way, I never liked to share my thoughts with anyone. Most likely due to fear of what they might think. Or the suggestions I would get on how to solve the worlds problems. But g changed my perspective on that and I slowly started to open up and talk about everything out loud... probably a little too much now, he gets an earful of just about everything (sorry bout it!). 

That is until recently.. Our schedules have been flipped upside down with g moving to a 12 hour day shift and mine still being all over the place. Maintaining a line of communication while traveling across the country has been difficult. Time zones, lack of sleep, and work responsibilities have slowly over time put a strain on how often we are able to talk and the quality of the conversation we are able to have. It doesn't happen overnight, you slowly realize that you haven't told your spouse what's going on in your life in a couple days so when it's time to catch up you're trying to backtrack and remember all of the things you made a mental note of that were important... I just want to pause for a quick second and say If this sounds like you I want you to clear your schedule and make time for your spouse.  A time for you two to be intentional and purposeful with your time together. I promise it'll be worth it. We all do it, put other priorities in front of our spouse, I'm guilty of it too. But when our communication with each other suffers our relationship suffers.

So, with all that said I want to invite you to join me on a quest to make communication a priority within our relationships. I'm going to share below a few things that G and I do to help boost our line of communication.

Love Letters
In the early stages of mine and G's relationship I would write long letters to him writing about everything from how much I loved him to how excited I was to go to the state fair. I never held anything back in those letters so what I wrote in them was my true self and thoughts. Fast forward to today writing letters has taken on a slightly different form. When I am in a new city or place I always try to find a unique looking card whether it has a funny saying, a love quote or it just looks cool I get it. I write about the layover I might be on or what I am feeling in that particular moment. I put in in an envelope put a stamp on it and put it in the mail...or I give it to him when I get home. Finding a mailbox can be trickier than it sounds. 

Post Its
Okay, okay, writing letters or cards may not be your cup of tea... Sometimes it's not my jam either! So, in comes post it notes. I go crazy with these things when I have them so if you ever come to my house and notice neon squares everywhere just know they all serve a purpose. This morning I littered the house with a bunch of post it notes. Writing inside jokes, words of encouragement, and random tidbits on them and placing them throughout the house. It's nice because even just one or two notes can make a big difference in opening up those lines of communication with G.

FaceTime
I always underestimate the power of FaceTime. I mean how lucky are we to live in time where we can see our spouse even from 1,000 miles away!? G is really good at initiating a FaceTime call I have to give him all of that credit. For whatever reason I always forget we can do that! Especially now that he has an iPhone (for the longest time he had a flip phone A. Flip. Phone.). After a FaceTime call I always feel so much more connected and in sync with him. Utilize your FaceTime or Skype for those with a fancy computer but still have ..a flip phone?

Old Fashioned Phone Call
Sometimes you can't always FaceTime and you ran out of paper writing out everyone's connecting gates on your last flight sooo what now? Just call em! A simple phone call is all it takes even just for five minutes. It seems old fashioned but how often do we pick up the phone nowadays? My preferred method of "communication" is texting, so sometimes that translates into my relationship with g. We will text each other for an entire day sometimes when I'm on a trip never once hearing each other's voice. Make that call, it'll make a difference.

These are all different ways G and I communicate with each other while I am away on a long stretch of trips but they can be so useful even if you work in the same city as each other. What are some unique and creative ways you communicate with your spouse? We are all different and our relationships are all unique so let me know your communication ways in the comment section below! The amount of post it notes around my house is getting a little cray. 

--M

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